“People don’t change.” Do you think that statement is true? In my 15 years of working with couples, I have seen many people change. In fact, I think that’s what good relationships are all about…we pull on each other...
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When “Right” is WRONG… Does this sound familiar? You approach your partner to tell them about something that upsets you. You start talking, but then of all the sudden your partner jumps in… “Wait, that isn’t right! That...
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You messed up. You really blew it. Your partner is giving you heck about it, seething with disappointment and hurt. Guilt washes over you, as your conscious mind reminds you that you didn’t keep your word or your end of a commitment. Or you...
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Previously, we presented the first six steps to telling the truth with your partner, even when it’s on a difficult or touchy subject. To review the article, where the steps are described in more detail, click here Make the decision to be...
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It’s understandable that couples are wary about bringing up sensitive topics. The avoidance of pain and distress are major motivators to go into hiding. But too much avoidance or passive behavior can lead to marital corrosion. So how can...
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Many people say the worst marital crime is having an affair. It breaks the bonds of trust that were assumed at the beginning of your relationship. Imagine you are in a start up company that is struggling. Then it is discovered that your partner...
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…a starting point for overcoming the pain of infidelity. Holy #@%!, I don’t need to tell you about the anguish you’re going through if you’ve discovered your partner cheated. Most couples don’t have a “no cheat” agreement. It is...
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Here’s something you can do for your relationship today. It’s called The Daily Double and it’s a way of tracking success in your relationship. You earn two points today by doing two positive things on the positive list below, while avoiding...
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The British Navy dominated the oceans for hundreds of years. What was their secret? They cleaned and did maintenance on the hulls of their ships. Their enemies took little care of theirs. The British sailors removed barnacles, seaweed and...
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Couples are often uncertain what to expect from the process of couples therapy. They are not sure of what to expect of the therapist or even if the therapist has any expectations of them. I have found most couples approach therapy with the notion...
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In my practice, I hear many couples say, ” I just want my partner to understand me. Who wouldn’t want that? You tell your partner things, they truly get what you say and you feel understood. And vice versa: your partner shares their...
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Listen below to our podcast… Why We Lie and How to Get Back to the Truth with Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson Your browser does not support the audio element. In this conversation, Ellyn Bader, Peter Pearson and Neil Sattin discuss the...
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